Ok, I know I’ve been quiet for a while now. I could make excuses but I won’t. I feel really bad about it actually because I know so many of you really enjoy relating to my posts and I really want you to feel like there’s someone out there who understands! So I resolve therefore to sin no more and post!
My husband has been nagging me to get on the puter and post, and frankly, I’ve just been in sort of a rut and been lazy.
DH and I have put our family on a master schedule and are bound to stick to it in an effort to be more effective and efficient. Included on this schedule is my time to spend with you all, blogging and answering contact forms (which I love to do BTW).
Let’s see… I thought I’d take a moment to share a couple God-moments since they are SO very uplifting and encouraging. I wish I could say that I am at the point in my spiritual journey where I have total faith in God without needing His constant consolations through so-called “God-moments” but I’m not there yet, so I thought I’d share them! #1 - I’ve really been struggling lately with jealousy. Yes, I’ll admit it, as hard as that is. I struggle with being jealousy of other mother’s with their nicer cars and their nicer houses. They have bigger diamonds and porcelain tiles floors. It’s so difficult for me not to be jealous. Praise God for my DH who sympathizes with me and reminds me that Christ calls us to Him first in tithing and after that, we save for our future and the future of our children. It is a healthy and holy thing to be generous and live within your means… (or at least that’s what my husband trys to tell me when I start to talk about how I need a new car that costs way too much!) Anyways… I happen to be really focusing one day last week on how so-n-so has this and she has that, and how I don’t and how well that’s not fair, etc. That evening, Chris had gotten a free dinner out from a grateful client, so he took me out to dinner like a wonderful husband would so I didn’t have to cook dinner that evening. After dinner, Chris asked the waiter to bring him a $50 gift card. I asked him, “Oh, who are you getting the gift card for?” He shrugged it off and told me not to worry about it. I figured he needed it for something and said nothing. Finally the waiter came back with the gift card, and Chris instructed him to give it anonymously to a couple that was sitting a few yards away from us who were dressed in fatigues and were obviously serving in the military. I was moved to tears by the generousity my husband had shown. He didn’t know those soldiers, and they hadn’t even noticed us, much less done anything for us. He simply wanted to extend to them a thanks for their service to our country for our freedom. Chris asked no credit or thanks for his gift. In fact, he didn’t want them to know who had sent it. But the look on their faces, the pure surprise and joy, was priceless. It was worth so much more than that $50. Just like that, my petty jealous seemed so irrational and selfish.
Story #2 - I spent yet another Wednesday morning being drilled on the teachings of the Catholic Church (especially on contraceptive, but not limited to) by my “Catholic accountability” group made up of about 5 other women who were on my CRHP formation team. Somehow or some way I always end up having to defend the faith or at least communicate it at these meetings. I feel like I’m always “on the spot” and my answers are not normally taken so well. So there I was really getting the questions/objections thrown at me by several other women and I have to defend the Church’s teachings right on the spot. Not my cup of tea, really. Nonetheless, I feel a burden on my heart to attend these meetings in hopes that my witness to the truth will plant a seed here and there in these women’s souls. This last Wednesday was especially difficult. There were many question asked and lots of objections to my answers. Anyways, I left and felt so discouraged. I just felt like I hadn’t spoken the truth effectively and persuasively enough. I felt like I totally let down Christ by not being able to defend the Church adequately and in the same breath, alienated these women from the Church. Basically I was feeling like I had failed Christ and failed His people as well. Then I turned on Relevant Radio. Father Corapi was on, and he said something to the effect of this: “There will come a time from the men will be separated from the boys, when you will not be able to stand on teh fence any longed. You will have to decide whether you are for Christ and speak the Truth, or against Him. There will be no middle ground. It’s a very difficult thing I know and Christ knew, for He said, ‘Let those who have ears hear, and those who have eyes, see.’ He was speaking about spiritual eyes and spiritual ears. So speak the Truth, and it will set you free.” I just bawled like a little baby. What a beautiful grace and beautiful consolation from Our Lord. It was His reassure that I was meant to be there to speak the truth in that time and place. What a grace.
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